simple truths

We all live in our own little world, filled with historical nature and nurture which creates our present.  It’s a complicated little world with conflicting emotions, feelings, and desires.  When we face another person, their little world, and our little world come together, resulting in the colliding of two worlds, to create a third little world.

Of course, when we view this third world, it is like asking people on either side of a statue to describe what they see.  Of course, one person will describe the front, and the other person the back.  But they are both looking at the same statue, just from different angles.

Nothing new here.

However, what is important, is that there really is no point arguing with how someone perceives their little world, since from their perspective they are totally correct and your words are unlikely to be heard productively.  Of course, if the other party is very open to change and honest with themselves, perhaps it will work, but the majority of people seem to get stuck in their perspectives in life.

Having said all of this, perhaps the first step should be to see if you are looking at things wrong yourself.

I’m sure that we have all been told the dictum, of “When Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade.”

It’s a nice idea, reminding people to make the best of things or situations that they find themselves in.  And usually it is true.

However, it is important to realize that sometimes there really isn’t all that much good that comes from a given situation.  It’s pretty much all bad.

Further, when people say it, usually the person they are saying it to isn’t in a place that they can productively use the advice, anyways!

So keep this in mind next time you think of quoting the dictum.  It might just be better form to express your sympathy.

Newton’s Third Law is, “To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction: or the forces of two bodies on each other are always equal and are directed in opposite directions.”

This law can be equally applied in human relationships (both in the home and work environment) as to anywhere else in physics.  I’ll apply it briefly to the work place.

You see, we often feel that due to one person’s cause, it created another’s (negative) effect.  However, in truth, it was the impact of the two parties that really created the overall outcome.

This is why it is usually fruitless to establish blame on one party or the other in incidents like these. Change either of the variables (i.e. either party) and the end result would probably never have happened.  All we can hope to do is change (remove) the right party so that the same negative outcome doesn’t continue once a new person takes their place.

P.S. Typically, we can see things playing out when we experience the “He Said, She Said” principle.  Where one party says that it X happened, and the other party said that Y happened, when really both X and Y happened, and the outcome was Z.

There is no such thing as original thought.

Just thoughts that we heard from somewhere else long enough ago to forgot that it wasn’t our own witticism.  Other ideas are typically are just built on principles established by those who came before us or are simply copied from those that we meet along the way.

The reason for this is that our world is a very structured and patterned world in its essence, and as beings that are a direct product of our physical environment (no matter if you choose religion or science), thought (and it’s offspring – action) simply follows those same familiar structures and patterns.

Even our creative process is bound by this truism.  We simply can’t imagine past that which we have experienced first hand – or through extrapolation of known entities.

Of course, I’m not saying anything new.

“The Peter Principle is a belief that in an organization where promotion is based on success, that organization’s members will eventually be promoted beyond their level of ability.”

At its essence this Principle is really based on another principle, which is that “You don’t know, what you don’t know.”

Basically, we are blind to what we don’t know, resulting in the fact that if we are unaware of this fact, we end up taking action based on faulty or partial information.

It is only once we make a mistake, which bring this lack of information front and center, that we realize what we didn’t know.

So while we can’t ever really know what we don’t know, the acknowledgement of the fact can at least better prepare us, and perhaps even help us fend off this typical human error in our daily lives.

Some claim that “love stinks,” but I would counter that “love sticks”.

Basically, to hate you have to love, so when someone is saying that love stinks, what they are really saying is that they are still in love, and that love sticks.

Just a witticism expressing the fact that before we can heal, we must first mourn our losses.

Those that chose not to mourn, are really preventing themselves from finding the peace that awaits them at the end of their journey.

Since, as I tell my kids, the language of the heart is love, and love and acceptance is at the base of all human needs, and loving makes us vulnerable to the acceptance of another, the end result is that our heart is the most delicate of objects.

I’m constantly surprised whenever I forget this fact.

My birthday is coming up soon.

In the past, I have always felt bitter-sweet on my birthday. My friends were there wishing me “Happy Birthday!”, but in truth, their happiness was just a temporary distraction from the nagging realization that I was one year older, and one year closer to death.

However, that is not my attitude this year.  I accomplished so much on a personal level this past year, that all I can do is celebrate my accomplishments.  I fell hard, and I got back up.  And I learned a lot about myself and life in the process.

With that in mind, it is time to end this blog.  While I originally expected it to go for a full year, at this point, I feel it has run its course, and other projects send forth their siren’s call.  I am sorry for letting any of my 15 loyal readers down.

Frankly, after 161 posts, I have run out of things to share, and don’t seem to be learning new insights at the rapid rate that I did those first few months when writing this blog provided a key outlet to help me stay sane.  Of course, I might have one things here or there still to share, but as the general theme of this blog is one of finding myself, relationships, and happiness, and that much has been shared, does anything else really matter?

So while I failed in my original goal of a post a day for a year, in truth, perhaps the original goal was slightly misled.  For what matters is life is quality and not quantity and so at this point as this chapter of my journey has ended, I think with it, this blog too.

Of course, every ending is a new beginning, and I look forward to learning the lessons that the next chapter brings, and perhaps even sharing them with you, if appropriate.

So fair thee well in your path through this world.  May life bring you so much happiness that you have no choice but to share it with others.